Harlequins and England scrum-half Danny Care has announced his retirement from international rugby after 15 years.
The 37-year-old walks away having made his 100th appearance in the 23-22 win over Ireland during this year’s Six Nations.
Care, who has featured a record 369 times for Harlequins during his career, played in all five of England’s Six Nations matches.
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“To play for England once was a dream come true. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d get the opportunity to do it over 100 times,” he said on Instagram.
“After a lot of reflection the past few months, the time feels right for myself and the team to retire from international rugby.
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Former England captain Owen Farrell says he does not know what the future brings with regards to International Rugby and says his moves move to Racing 92 can help him get back to enjoying his rugby again.
“The past 12 months in this England team have been arguably my favourite, making memories that my family and I will cherish and remember forever.”
Care made his England debut at the age of 21 against New Zealand in June 2008 and has since gone on to win the Six Nations in 2011 and 2017 either side of the Grand Slam in 2016, while also playing at two Rugby World Cups in 2015 and 2023.
He scored 15 tries and three drop-goals during his international career and was just the seventh player to reach 100 caps for England, making his 101st and final appearance against France.
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“We’re incredibly proud of Danny and everything he has achieved for England,” said Harlequins Director of Rugby Billy Millard.
“He’s been the ultimate professional for the past 15 years and worked extremely hard to fight his way back to achieve 101 caps. It’s a huge testament to his character, hard work and professionalism and we congratulate him on a fantastic England career and look forward to his continued impact at Quins.”
There are no national reporting requirements that track arrests or prosecutions under state laws that criminalize people living with HIV.
Until recently, it wasn’t clear how frequently people were arrested or prosecuted under six Ohio laws that criminalize certain acts – including sex – or substantially increase the penalties. Some of the laws also apply to people with hepatitis or tuberculosis.
Research released by the Ohio Health Modernization Movement and Equality Ohio, two groups pushing for the laws to be reformed, identified 214 cases prosecuted in Ohio during a six-year-period ending in 2020. The information came from court dockets, clerks and prosecutors in Ohio’s 88 counties. That number is likely lower than the actual number of cases prosecuted. Not all counties included detailed enough information on the charges, some cases weren’t counted.
What are Ohio’s six laws that criminalize living with HIV?
Ohio law considers it a type of felonious assault to have sexual contact with another person without telling them if you have HIV, hepatitis or tuberculosis. This crime can be prosecuted regardless of whether the virus was transmitted or protection, such as condoms, were used. It doesn’t matter if the person had an undetectable level of virus in their blood and was unable to transmit HIV.
It is also illegal to harass a person with a bodily substance, including blood, saliva, feces, urine or semen. The penalties increase for a person with HIV.
Soliciting sex, selling sex or loitering in an area with the intent to sell sex are all illegal and have increased penalties for people living with HIV.
Selling or donating blood or plasma if you have HIV is also against the law.
Where in Ohio are the most cases prosecuted?
Researchers found the most prosecutions in places with the highest populations. That includes: Cuyahoga, Hamilton, Franklin and Lucas counties.
Cuyahoga County charged four times the number of cases under the six laws than Franklin County, which has a higher population and more people living with HIV and AIDS.
The Marshall Project looked at 36 Cuyahoga County prosecutions from 2016 through 2022. The cases involved 18 law enforcement agencies, including three hospital police departments and public transit police. More than a third of the cases were for not disclosing an HIV status. Just under a third were for “harassment by inmate” which the prosecutor’s office said included cases involving hepatitis and not just HIV.
How many people in Ohio have had an HIV diagnosis?
In 2022, about 25,000 people in Ohio were living with HIV, according to the state’s health department. The rate of Black residents diagnosed with HIV was more than six times the rate of white residents.
In Cleveland, new HIV diagnoses rose by 6% between 2017 and 2021.
What types of cases were prosecuted most often?
More than half – 56% – of the cases identified were for “harassment” with a bodily substance, such as saliva, urine, feces or blood.
A third of the cases – 36% – were for “felonious assault,” which carries the most severe penalty of any HIV-related charge. The rest – 8% – were cases involving sex work. Researchers didn’t find prosecutions for selling or donating contaminated blood
How do Ohio laws increase penalties for people living with HIV compared to those who do not have the virus?
Penalties for individuals living with HIV can be anywhere from two to 29 times longer than those for people who are HIV-negative.
Harassment with a bodily substance charges carry a penalty of up to 5 years in prison and a $10,000 fine. That range is 1 to 6 times greater than for a person who does not have HIV. The potential fine is three times greater.
Felonious assault for not disclosing an HIV-positive status carries a minimum penalty of 2 to 8 years and up to 12 years in prison and a $15,000 fine. A person may also be required to registered as a sex offender. This penalty doesn’t exist for a person without HIV.
Prostitution without disclosing HIV status carries a penalty of 1-3 years in prison and a $10,000 fine. That range is 6 to18 times greater than for a person who does not have HIV. The fine is 19 times greater.
Soliciting without disclosing HIV status carries a penalty of 1-3 years in prison and a $10,000 fine. That range is 6 to18 times greater than for a person who does not have HIV. The fine is 19 times greater.
Loitering while intending to sell sex while HIV positive carries a penalty 6-12 months in prison and a $2,500 fine. That range is 2 to 5 times greater. The fine is four times greater.
How are historically marginalized groups affected by HIV-related prosecutions?
Court records lack or have conflicting information on race or ethnicity. The sex captured in law enforcement records does not always accurately capture a person’s gender identity. Records also don’t include whether a person is identified as an LGBTQ+.
That prevents a full understanding of how the laws impact people of color and LGBTQ+ people. However, there is a significant racial disparity between people charged under HIV criminalization statutes when compared to the general population.
Of people prosecuted in Ohio, 35.9% of defendants were identified as Black. The 2020 U.S. Census identified 12.5% of people as Black.
A separate report from the Williams Institute based at UCLA, looked at arrests under Ohio’s six laws over a 22-year span. The institute does legal and public policy research on sexual orientation and gender identity.
It found that:
Women were over-represented in HIV-related arrests: 48% of people arrested, but only 21% of people living with HIV in Ohio.
Black people were 44% of people arrested for allegations of an HIV-related offense in Ohio, but made up 13% of the state population and 44% of people living with HIV in Ohio.
Last month, my go-to fashion piece was the Bettie skirt. The way it perfectly paired with a cozy sweater created a chic and effortless look that I couldn’t get enough of. It quickly became my signature look for fall 2023.
This month, I’m in love with the Harlow skirt from Sézane. It’s truly something special! Its impeccable design and meticulous attention to detail make it a real head-turner. The best part? It’s incredibly versatile, effortlessly transitioning from day to night. And its flattering silhouette makes my legs look long, which is an added bonus.
Today I’m sharing how I styled this Sézane skirt three different ways.
As always, I put together my honest thoughts on each piece and provided fit notes. Enjoy!
This was such a fun look to put together because it is easy! The Emile cardigan in black is the perfect match for the Harlow skirt. I love the black-on-black combination—you can’t mess it up. I decided to pair these pieces with the Adèle boots, which add a bit of an edgy vibe.
Fit Notes: The Harlow skirt runs a little small, so if you are in between sizes, I recommend sizing up. The Emile cardigan has a slightly oversized fit, so if you are in between sizes, consider choosing the size below.
For a more neutral and understated look, pair the Harlow skirt with the Tobias sweater. This combination creates a soft and simple ensemble. This sweater is so good I wear it everywhere—the grocery store, Pilates class, and out to dinner. It’s perfect for running errands or grabbing a casual lunch with friends. Wear this ensemble with a great pair of sneakers and you are ready for the day.
Fit Notes: The Tobias sweater fits true to size. However, if you prefer a more fitted look, I recommend going down a size. The Harlow skirt runs a bit small (see note under outfit one above).
Alright, picture this: You’ve got the classic, timeless Harlow skirt paired with the oh-so-comfy Melvin sweater. Add in some ankle boots and you’ve got yourself an effortlessly chic outfit. The softness of the sweater perfectly balances out the sleekness of the skirt for ultimate comfort and style.
Fit Notes: The Melvin sweater is a cozy style that fits true to size. The Harlow skirt runs a bit small (see note under outfit one above).
Whether you’re into the timeless all-black look or a chic neutral ensemble, the Harlow skirt has got you covered. It’s like having a fashion playground at your fingertips! Check out Sézane’s website to get your hands on these wardrobe items and explore their other stunning pieces.
Editor’s Note: This post was sponsored by Sézane. The compensation we receive in exchange for placement on Wit & Delight is used to purchase props, hire a photographer, write/edit the blog post, and support the larger team behind Wit & Delight.
While compensation was received in exchange for coverage, all thoughts and opinions are always my own. Sponsored posts like these allow us to continue to develop dynamic unsponsored content. Thank you for supporting our partners!
Kate is the founder of Wit & Delight. She is currently learning how to play tennis and is forever testing the boundaries of her creative muscle. Follow her on Instagram at @witanddelight_.
When it comes to holiday planning, one thing I’ve learned over the years is this: Waiting until the last minute to complete (or start) the various tasks associated with the holiday season is not a gift to me. Instead, I’ve found that setting the groundwork early in the season helps me create truly personal experiences—and actually savor them while they’re happening. By taking the time to plan and prepare in advance, I’m able to infuse the holiday season with an extra touch of magic, ensuring that every moment is thoroughly enjoyed.
If you tend to find yourself more stressed than usual throughout the holiday season, these are some of the holiday planning tasks you can do now to make life easier for yourself over the next couple of months. These ideas are, of course, dependent on the specific holidays you personally celebrate. Whether it’s Thanksgiving, Christmas, Hanukkah, Diwali, Kwanzaa, or any other festive occasion, I hope everyone can find some helpful insights in the list below.
How far in advance should you start your holiday planning?
It is recommended to start preparing for the holidays at least one to two months in advance. This allows you enough time to make a thorough holiday planning checklist that’s personal to you, set your budget, purchase gifts, and make any necessary travel arrangements. Starting early helps reduce stress and ensures a smoother holiday season. By preparing for the holidays now, you can avoid that last-minute panic that sets in and robs us of the holiday spirit come December.
7 Holiday Planning Tasks to Do Right Now
1. Make a checklist of holiday tasks you need to complete.
Make a checklist of any tasks you need to do related to the holidays (particularly if you’ll be hosting at any point). Some tasks may be in this blog post and others will be personal to you. This can include anything you need to purchase, anything you need to clean, any invites you need to send, etc. While you don’t necessarily need to start checking off every task right now, you’ll be glad you already have the list made once the time comes to begin holiday preparation. If you can, give yourself dates or deadlines for these tasks and group like tasks together (e.g., purchases, decorations, party planning).
For a recent party we hosted, Joe and I created a shared doc of tasks that needed to be completed beforehand. We could both check things off over time and easily split the responsibilities. It was immensely helpful!
2. Design and order your holiday cards (if you’re sending them).
The thoughtful act of sending holiday cards can become a chore if you wait until the very last minute to order them (I know from experience). It can be frustrating to scramble through limited options and rush the process. Save yourself the stress later on and order holiday cards early this year. I would suggest ordering them by mid-November and sending them in the first week of December. Plan ahead, choose the perfect design for you, and make this year’s holiday card-sending experience a delightful one!
We’ve used Minted for our holiday cards for the past couple of years. What I like about Minted is that there is a style option for everyone. I also love that I can store my address book in my Minted account and have the addresses added to each envelope—this saves me a ton of time.
If you are planning on including a family photo in your cards, I highly recommend getting your photos taken in early September or October. While I am by no means always this prepared, we had ours taken in September this year and it felt so nice to have it checked off the list extra early. If you didn’t have a chance to get family photos taken this year, consider setting a digital reminder for yourself for late next summer to schedule a fall family photo session.
3. Decide on the holiday decor you want to get this year (if any!).
The reality is that some of the best decor (especially decor at more budget-friendly prices) tends to sell out early. This doesn’t mean you need to rush out to buy everything right this second. However, having a holiday decor list ready to go will mean that if you do see something you need at a price you’re willing to pay, you can purchase it in the moment with the assurance that it was already on your list.
Dig out your box(es) of holiday decor from last year and assess what you need (if anything) for this holiday season. I highly recommend investing in pieces that you can reuse year after year. If you are just beginning to collect your holiday decorations, I would recommend starting where you get the most bang for your buck, which in my opinion is greenery. Whether it’s a lush wreath on the front door, garlands draped along the staircase, or a beautiful centerpiece for the dining table, it instantly adds a holiday vibe to any space, with or without additional decorations.
These are a few of the places I love to shop for holiday decor:
4. Buy a few wrapping supplies.
There will be plenty of wrapping supplies available throughout the holiday season, from gift bags to wrapping paper to gift tags. But if you’re going for a specific aesthetic and want wrapping accouterments from certain collections that tend to sell out (I’m looking at you, Heath & Hand With Magnolia), consider buying it early. I like to shop for ribbons at party supply stores like Litin’s because you can often get a ton of them for a low price!
5. Stock up on decorating essentials.
While they’re not the star of the show, having tools like Command Hooks on hand will be very helpful when you decide you want to decorate your house for the holidays (and don’t want to have a last-minute Target run involved). We use them for hanging garlands and wreaths all throughout our house.
Not having the proper decorating tools can make decorating super aggravating. While it’s not the sexiest thing to spend your money on, it’s going to save you the headache of falling wreaths and precariously-palaced garland… I speak from experience!
6. Start making gifting lists.
To ensure you find the perfect gifts for friends and family members, set aside a few minutes to brainstorm gift ideas for each person on your list, considering their hobbies and personal interests as you do. If you find yourself coming up empty, do not hesitate to reach out to the giftee! I think it’s perfectly okay to send them a short Q&A to help get your wheels turning. By gathering more details, you’ll have a better chance of coming up with thoughtful and personalized gift ideas. Questions could include:
What’s a hobby you want to pick up?
What’s your favorite color?
What’s your favorite indulgence?
How do you unwind?
Or, if they’re comfortable sharing exact links, simply ask them, “What’s on your wish list?”
7. Make your own wish list.
While some people frown upon this, I see no problem in proactively sending a wish list of items you want to people you know are going to give you a gift. Send a small variety (so they still have the option to choose) with exact links. With all of the talk of reducing clutter and donating items in our homes, I think there is something particularly helpful about getting gifts you truly want and will keep over time.
There you have it, folks! A few surefire holiday planning ideas to steer clear of headaches and sail smoothly into a stress-free holiday season. Remember, it’s all about thoughtful gestures and creating experiences that resonate. So go ahead, pour yourself a hot cup of cocoa, cozy up by the fire, and check one (or a few) of these items off your holiday planning checklist.
Editor’s Note: This article contains affiliate links. Wit & Delight uses affiliate links as a source of revenue to fund the operations of the business and to be less dependent on branded content. Wit & Delight stands behind all product recommendations. Still have questions about these links or our process? Feel free to email us.
Kate is the founder of Wit & Delight. She is currently learning how to play tennis and is forever testing the boundaries of her creative muscle. Follow her on Instagram at @witanddelight_.
Just a few hours before sunset in mid-March, World Central Kitchen workers scrambled to put the final touches on a makeshift jetty built out of rubble, as the ship carrying the first aid to reach the Gaza Strip by sea in nearly two decades backed toward the shore.
The crew from the disaster relief nonprofit still had to cover the jetty’s sharp edges and poking rebar, reminders that the rubble used to build the structure in northern Gaza came from bombed buildings. Using square pieces of debris, they created a vertical concrete wall to meet the ship.
“Running any sort of construction project in Gaza at this current time has got a ridiculous amount of challenges,” said Sam Bloch, the director of emergency response for World Central Kitchen, which was founded by the renowned Spanish chef José Andrés. Mr. Bloch, who oversaw the building of the jetty and the arrival of the shipment, described the scene by phone from Oakland, Calif., after leaving Gaza.
The arrival of the ship, which had sailed from Cyprus after the aid was inspected there, marked a milestone in a venture that Western officials hope will play a part in easing the enclave’s food deprivation. The operation has been described as a pilot project for the broader opening of a maritime corridor to supply the territory.
Once the food was unloaded, it was distributed in Gaza by truck — including in the north, where experts say famine is imminent. International aid agencies have largely stopped operations in the area, citing Israeli restrictions, security issues and poor road conditions.
At least two attempts to deliver food aid to desperate Palestinians in northern Gaza have ended in bloodshed in recent weeks, with Palestinian and Israeli officials blaming each other for the deadly scenes.
The Israeli military helped World Central Kitchen’s operation, providing security and coordination, according to an Israeli official who requested anonymity to speak about a sensitive matter. Every step was carried out with permission from the Israeli military, Mr. Bloch said.
“It was a lot of stop and go,” he said, and progress “was definitely not consistent or predictable.”
The construction of the World Central Kitchen jetty took six days, with the job site sometimes running around the clock as the jetty slowly extended into the sea, one rubble-filled truck at a time. “Using rubble was a big challenge,” Mr. Bloch said, “but it is the only resource that is plentiful enough in Gaza at the moment.”
The rubble was brought mostly from southern Gaza, but also from around the work site. The head contractor, who had lost two of his homes to bombings about one mile away from the jetty, went with his dump trucks and heavy machinery to collect what remained of his destroyed homes, Mr. Bloch said.
Most of the construction equipment, including front-end loaders, dump trucks, flatbed trucks, cranes and a fuel truck, came from southern Gaza, Mr. Bloch said. But one piece of equipment, a movable light tower that allowed construction to continue through the night, had to be retrieved from a bombed-out warehouse in the north.
In coordination with the Israeli military, a small convoy, accompanied by heavy machinery to clear the roads, was sent to a warehouse in Gaza City, where local contractors had identified what they believed was the only light tower left in Gaza, Mr. Bloch said.
To unload the ship, which contained just under half a million meals, a large crane at the end of the jetty transferred food pallets onto eighteen-wheeler trucks that had been carefully backed down the jetty.
By the time the shipment was unloaded, it was nearing midnight. World Central Kitchen decided to send the trucks to a warehouse in Deir al Balah, a few miles south of the jetty, and distribute the aid during daylight hours.
A few days later, the trucks moved up Salah al-Din road, the main artery through central Gaza, to the southern edge of Gaza City, where hungry families collected food directly off the trucks. Nobody was hurt during the distribution, according to Mr. Bloch.
In the future, World Central Kitchen hopes to speed up the process by sending food directly from the jetty to communities in northern Gaza, Mr. Bloch said. The organization is also working to develop community kitchens that will serve as distribution points.
Building community kitchens is the bread and butter of World Central Kitchen. The group already has 68 in southern Gaza that provide most of the hot meals to civilians there, Mr. Bloch said.
World Central Kitchen has loaded a larger ship in Cyprus that, as of Monday, was still waiting for the right weather conditions before departing for Gaza.
Harry Brook is set to be available for the beginning of Yorkshire’s Vitality County Championship campaign, according to head coach Ottis Gibson.
Brook withdrew from England’s Test tour of India in January due to personal reasons and, following the death of his grandmother Pauline last month, he pulled out of a stint with Delhi Capitals in the Indian Premier League to be close to his family.
He has signalled to Yorkshire he is ready to resume his playing career, though, and Gibson is hopeful Brook will make his comeback for their Division Two opener against Leicestershire, starting on April 5.
Brook, who has not played any competitive cricket this year, could feature in a handful of matches in the Championship before linking up with England ahead of their T20 World Cup title defence in June.
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Michael Atherton and Nasser Hussain discuss what could be next for England and Bazball after their loss to India.
“Now that Brooky isn’t going to the IPL, I suspect he’s going to be available to us for the first few games, including Leicestershire,” Gibson said in quotes on Yorkshire’s website. “He loves playing for us.”
Gibson suggested Yorkshire’s prospects could be enhanced further in the early rounds by the availability of Joe Root, who like Brook excused himself from this year’s IPL.
“Rooty is also going to be available for some games in that early period,” Gibson added. “Having those two playing for us would be special.”
England, meanwhile, have slipped to the bottom of the World Test Championship standings after Sri Lanka completed a 328-run thrashing of Bangladesh inside four days in Sylhet.
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England captain Stokes insists the team have progressed during the tour of India, despite suffering a series defeat
Although England have prevailed in three of their 10 Tests with Sri Lanka gaining a first triumph in three fixtures in the 2023-25 cycle, teams are ranked according to the percentage of points won.
Hindering England’s progress was a 19-point deduction for slow over-rates in four of last year’s five Ashes Tests during a thrilling series which finished 2-2. England have just been beaten 4-1 in India.
Had the deduction not been applied, England, third in the International Cricket Council Test rankings behind India and Australia, would sit in fifth place in the the nine-team World Test Championship.
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Nasser Hussain assesses which team has made the best signings in this year’s The Hundred men’s draft.
Ben Stokes’ side have a dozen matches remaining before the final at Lord’s in June 2025, starting with three-Test series at home against both the West Indies and Sri Lanka this summer and winter tours to Pakistan and New Zealand before the year is out.
England have failed to reach the final in either of the first two editions, finishing fourth in the 2021-23 cycle – having languished at the bottom of the table for a period before the appointment of Stokes as captain and Brendon McCullum as head coach led to a turnaround in results.
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Caymir Weaver kept his gaze forward and his jaw set as a county judge chastised him during an October court date.
“You disrespect everything that’s proper and moral and ethical,” Mahoning County Common Pleas Judge R. Scott Krichbaum told him.
Weaver was used to being judged for having HIV. He’d had it since he was born. But now he was facing time in prison for it.
Months earlier, the 22-year-old had reconnected with a high school friend. After chatting on social media, they hung out, and eventually, he gave her oral sex. Weaver thought his friend remembered he was living with HIV — he had been open about it his entire life — but after he reminded her, she got upset and called the police.
Prosecutors charged Weaver with felonious assault for not notifying his partner of his HIV status. He faced up to eight years in prison. It didn’t matter that there was “little to no risk” of transmitting the virus or that Weaver’s partner tested negative. But he was scared, so he took a plea deal. Prosecutors agreed not to argue for prison.
Now his fate was in the hands of a judge who was first elected in 1990, one year after Ohio made it a crime to expose a person to the virus. It was a time when an HIV diagnosis was basically a death sentence. Advancements in treatment now allow those with HIV to live full lives. The 71-year-old Krichbaum made it clear he still considered HIV lethal, and the law blunt. What Weaver did was “like shooting a gun and hitting somebody, and they survive,” Krichbaum said. “That’s what this crime is.”
And for that, the judge decided Weaver belonged in prison for a year. Krichbaum tacked on an extra 30 days in the county jail to punish him for showing up a few minutes late and for being dressed in a white tracksuit and tennis shoes — an outfit Weaver bought for the hearing, but Krichbaum deemed inappropriate.
Weaver’s resolve broke. His attorney handed him a tissue before deputies took him away.
Weaver is serving his sentence at the Ohio Reformatory for Women in Marysville. He has identified as male since high school but was assigned female at birth.
“It was hurtful how he spoke to me, how he treated me,” said Weaver, months later in a call from prison. “Like I was basically poison.”
A push to ‘modernize’ HIV laws
Across the country, there’s a push to repeal or update the types of laws that put Weaver in prison. Most of the laws were put on the books decades ago, fueled by fear and absent scientific understanding about how the virus is transmitted, and long before advances in HIV treatments.
Ohio has six different laws that criminalize certain acts — including sex — for people living with HIV, or that substantially increase penalties for them, compared to people who do not have the virus.
There are no national reporting requirements that track the arrests or prosecutions. Most of the available information is collected by advocates or researchers. Until recently, it was unclear how often Ohio prosecutors charged people under the laws, which also apply to people living with viral hepatitis or tuberculosis.
Last month, Equality Ohio and the Ohio Health Modernization Movement released results of a three-year effort to count prosecutions in Ohio’s 88 counties. Compiling information from court dockets and public records requests to court clerks and prosecutors, the groups tallied 214 cases prosecuted over a six-year period.
About a third of the cases were like Weaver’s: felonious assault, which carries the most severe penalty of any HIV-related charge. More than half of the cases were for “harassment” with a bodily substance, most often involving law enforcement, corrections officers or healthcare workers. Ohio law doesn’t distinguish between bodily fluids that can transmit HIV, such as blood, and those that do not, such as saliva, urine or feces.
Ohio’s laws don’t require HIV transmission
Ohio’s laws are among the most punitive when it comes to HIV criminalization, said Jada Hicks, staff attorney for the Center for HIV Law and Policy. That includes stiff penalties for failing to disclose HIV status — regardless of whether the virus is or can be transmitted. In some cases, the law also requires sex offender registration.
“Ohio takes a more carceral approach to HIV than a public health approach,” Hicks said.
Mahoning County Prosecutor Gina DeGenova said it isn’t her job to weigh in on what the law should be. It’s to enforce the law as it is currently written, as her office did in Weaver’s case. DeGenova said with updates to technology and knowledge on how infections are transmitted, it “makes absolute sense to review the status of these laws.”
Ohio’s laws that criminalize living with HIV were first passed in 1989. That year, AIDS-related complications were the second leading cause of death among men between 25-44 years.
The original laws did not specifically reference HIV status, instead requiring prosecutors to prove that having sex while living with HIV was akin to carrying a deadly weapon.
Several high-profile examples of HIV transmission dominated the country’s attention in the 1990s, notably the New York case of Nushawn Williams, who had sex with over 100 women.
Following the media panic caused by cases like that of Williams, many states updated their HIV laws. In 2000, Ohio’s laws were changed to more specifically add HIV status into the language and criminalize exposure, not transmission.
Weaver was born with HIV in New Jersey in 2001, as some states were sharpening their HIV laws and ramping up prosecutions. His mother died of a heroin overdose shortly after his younger brother was born.
“I don’t really remember her,” Weaver said.
He bounced around to seven different foster homes and was separated from his four older brothers before being adopted at age 3. His new family also included a sibling set of five from Texas, adopted by — as he calls them — his parents.
From what Weaver was told by his parents, his birth mother was living with HIV and took antiretroviral medicines while pregnant with his older brothers, all of whom were born without HIV. Weaver and his younger brother were born with the virus, but his brother — and not Caymir — was given antiretroviral treatments and his status reverted to negative. Weaver was never told why.
As a child, Weaver’s family made regular trips to Cleveland and Akron to get testing and treatments for HIV. The medical treatments kept the levels of virus in his body at undetectable levels, his mother, Ruth, told The Marshall Project. Their church and some family members shunned them for adopting a child with HIV. Instead of staying scared, the family got educated about the virus.
From the start, Weaver’s parents had the same message: Be open, be safe.
“They gave it to me straight up. So if I was bleeding or cut my hand or something, they taught me that I always had to wear gloves and make sure that everyone was protected,” Weaver said.
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His parents also gave him “the sex talk.” He remembers being in a doctor’s office when he was nine or 10 and being shown how to put on a condom. Even then, he wasn’t worried.
“I already knew I wasn’t going to be having sex with guys,” Weaver laughed.
The lesson that most stuck with Weaver was to be open about his HIV status. When he would get close with people — friends or romantic interests — he would disclose his status, even if it meant being bullied as a result.
“People would use it against me, call me ‘HIV-bitch’ and other names. It did hurt me at one point in time, but there’s nothing I could really do. I was born this way and I had to tell people close to me,” Weaver said.
A reunion with an old friend, and a call to police
It was while scrolling through Facebook at the end of 2022 that Weaver saw the profile of a close high school classmate he’d lost touch with after dropping out his senior year. Weaver recalled exactly where they were about four years earlier when he told her that he was living with HIV: on the school bus with another friend whose name he specifically still remembers.
“I told her my whole story, [including] that I was HIV-positive. She sat there and took it all in and said she understood,” Weaver recalled.
The two met up in February 2023 and on the second day, things became sexual. Weaver said he gave the woman oral sex. The next morning, after Weaver was back at his own home, a voice inside him told him that he should remind his friend about his HIV status.
Candice Evers for The Marshall Project
“She flipped out. She said, ‘If I have it, I’m going to kill you.’ I just kept telling her that you can’t get [HIV] from saliva,” Weaver said.
A few hours later, the friend contacted the Austintown police.
Police questioned Weaver at his home that same day. But it wasn’t until months later that he was charged with felonious assault, arrested and booked into the county jail on June 1, 2023.
“I didn’t eat for five days. They put me on a suicide watch, which meant sleeping on a mat on a dirty concrete floor with cameras watching you,” Weaver said.
After seven days of suicide watch, he was placed in the section of the jail reserved for people accused of serious crimes, such as murder. He said the women there treated him like family, made sure he ate and were mad about Weaver’s charges.
“There was even a nurse in that pod who kept saying, ‘But you can’t get HIV that way!’ Everybody knew that,” Weaver said.
Weaver sat in jail for 41 days, until eventually, his family was able to post his $12,000 bond.
Medical experts say that fear is not rooted in science
Dr. Joseph Cherabie, assistant professor in the Division of Infectious Diseases at Washington University, said that the risk of HIV transmission by oral sex between two individuals assigned female at birth is “zero.”
Cherabie pointed to research, including a 10-year study that observed no transmissions in people who received oral sex among 8,965 acts, and a 1998 study that observed no transmissions due to oral sex.
The Record
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Under Ohio law, the science of transmission doesn’t matter. And it didn’t matter to Judge Krichbaum when he spoke to Weaver: “The law says it doesn’t matter what you do, you gotta tell somebody ahead of time, ‘This is what I have, do you still want to engage or do you not want to engage?’”
In Weaver’s case, the prosecutor said discrepancies around that key issue — whether he disclosed his HIV status — led to the plea agreement. DeGenova said had there been no deal, her office would have recommended a sentence similar to the one the judge gave Weaver, she said. The victim, she said, agreed to the plea deal.
Laws disproportionately affect Black, LGBTQ+ people
HIV decriminalization advocates say Weaver’s case highlights how the current laws can be used to discriminate against people living with HIV solely based on their health status, and even when there isn’t a risk of transmission. That is especially true for Black Ohioans, like Weaver, who test positive for HIV at higher rates.
Authors of the recent Ohio report found that police and court records often lacked information on race or ethnicity, and the gender captured in law enforcement records didn’t always reflect a person’s gender identity. That prevents researchers from fully understanding the impact that these laws are having on some of the most vulnerable populations in Ohio, including LGBTQ+ people, people experiencing incarceration and people of color.
“These laws continue to harm marginalized communities, and we’re seeing [Caymir’s] case exemplify that,” said Hicks, with The Center for HIV Law and Policy. “We’re seeing someone who has already been othered based on their race. We’re seeing a little bit of homophobia. We’re seeing a little bit of HIV exceptionalism. We’re seeing fear-mongering. We’re seeing all of that in [this] case.”
In 2022, the Center for HIV Law and Policy filed a complaint with the Department of Justice on behalf of people living with HIV in Ohio and Tennessee.
In December, the DOJ notified Tennessee it was violating the Americans with Disabilities Act by enforcing the state’s law that increases penalties for people convicted of prostitution if they also have HIV. On Feb. 15, the justice department sued the state and its state investigations bureau for discriminating against people living with HIV.
Enduring prison and reflecting
Nearly four months into his sentence, Weaver, now 23, is trying to keep his spirits up.
He said he was scared when he was taken from jail to prison, but has met supportive people.
His mother Ruth has been there, too. They talk as often as possible between her shifts cleaning and working a restaurant job. It weighs on her that she couldn’t afford an attorney to help fight his case. She’d watched her child be hurt and rejected his whole life for having a virus he didn’t ask for. The judge added imprisoned to the list.
The holiday season is here, and I’m doing things differently for our 2023 holiday decor. Since we moved into our home in 2020, I’ve been “going big” on the holiday decorations. It’s the only holiday I “decor” for, and I’ve been thoughtfully adding pieces to our holiday displays and building up our collection for a couple of years now. While it was expensive at the onset, I now have a great collection to pull from for years to come. And with two young kids who appreciate the magic of the season, it feels extra meaningful to decorate in a way that makes our home a holiday wonderland for them.
This year, I’m not planning to add many more pieces to my collection. Mostly, I’m thinking about the little touches I might want to incorporate, like fresh ribbon for decorating and pretty gift wrap for presents under the tree.
Depending on your phase of life, there will be some years when you’re stocking up on foundation holiday decorations, years when you’re simply adding a few accent pieces to the mix, and others when you’re bringing in only a few extra special details. The idea is that you make those purchasing decisions thoughtfully, buying select items you’re excited to display and leaving the rest behind.
I put together this 2023 holiday decor post around that intentional framework, so you can shop based on your specific holiday decor needs right now. The post is organized into three categories: foundation decor, accent pieces, and special touches. I made sure to include a number of decor items I own and can vouch for, which are noted in the list below.
My Favorite 2023 Holiday Decor Products
Foundation Decor
Foundation pieces like trees, garlands, and wreaths are the base of any holiday decor scheme. They’re the pieces to buy first if you’re just starting your decor collection or wanting to replace a weathered item you’ve had for a while. If we think of dressing our homes like putting together an outfit, these pieces are akin to a great sweater or classic trousers. Even though these elements don’t necessarily make a statement on their own, they do still have a significant impact. I always recommend buying high-quality foundation decor pieces and investing a little more where possible, depending on your budget. That way, these core items will still feel and look brand new, year after year.
Items I own that were gifted to me by the brand are marked with *.
Accent holiday decor pieces are secondary items like stockings, tree skirts, ornament sets, and festive pillows that bring life to the foundation pieces. Through these items, your style can shine through. I usually like to purchase accent decor pieces in classic styles with a unique twist. I love to mix and match different pieces from my collection and create a distinct look each year.
Special touches are items like keepsake ornaments and decorative ribbons that you might add to your collection once you’re all set on foundation and accent pieces. Our family gets a few new ornaments every year, and I’ll tie gorgeous velvet or silk ribbons on trees or garland to add a little extra something. We also display a beautiful reusable advent calendar every year, which is an amazing activity to do with kids. We’re thinking of going a different route in terms of what we put in the advent calendar this year. We might incorporate something like a joke of the day, daily activities (e.g., build a snowman, watch a classic movie), or maybe little candies from different places around the world.
Editor’s Note: This article contains affiliate links. Wit & Delight uses affiliate links as a source of revenue to fund the operations of the business and to be less dependent on branded content. Wit & Delight stands behind all product recommendations. Still have questions about these links or our process? Feel free to email us.
Kate is the founder of Wit & Delight. She is currently learning how to play tennis and is forever testing the boundaries of her creative muscle. Follow her on Instagram at @witanddelight_.
It’s the holiday gifting season! Today I’m sharing all of this year’s gift guides at once, including gifts $50 and under, home decor gifts, and gifts for guys, kids, girlfriends, and parents and in-laws. With any gift idea you choose, make sure you consider why that gift feels meaningful for the person you’re giving it to. I find that this kind of intentional, thoughtful approach to gifting is always the best way to go.
Shop all of my holiday gift guide 2023 picks below. Happy gifting!
Gifts $50 and Under
1. A cute phone case, $50 on sale for $38. You can never go wrong with a stylish phone accessory.
3. Spanish hand cream, $6. This hand cream is luscious and more special than something you would pick up at your local drugstore.
4. A personal card, $20. Sometimes writing a meaningful message in a beautiful card makes for the best gift.
5. A favorite memento in a beautiful frame, $40 on sale for $28. Frame an item you’ve saved over the years that means something to both of you (e.g., the dinner menu from your first date).
6. Great butter, $14. Really good butter reminds me of my recent trip to France. It’s simple and luxurious at the same time.
7. A pretty puzzle, $32. Get one that looks frame-worthy when finished.
1. A collector’s edition or vintage edition of their favorite book. You can go big with a grand gesture like a limited-edition copy from The Folio Society (they have some options under $100 as well). You can also search for a beloved title on Etsy or eBay to find something that fits your budget!
9. A Le Labo candle, $84. A little luxury each time they light it.
Editor’s Note: This article contains affiliate links. Wit & Delight uses affiliate links as a source of revenue to fund the operations of the business and to be less dependent on branded content. Wit & Delight stands behind all product recommendations. Still have questions about these links or our process? Feel free to email us.
Kate is the founder of Wit & Delight. She is currently learning how to play tennis and is forever testing the boundaries of her creative muscle. Follow her on Instagram at @witanddelight_.